It has been a while, so I hope my writing is still up to scratch. I am so grateful to everyone who reached out to ask how I was because you were worried about me, or missed my writing. It didn’t go unnoticed.

So, where have I been?

Well….

In July I had a breakdown. Everything just got too much, the surgery, the scans, the chemo, it also felt like I was reliving some of the hardest times of my life all over again and I just couldn’t bare it. The chemo was making me so ill. The longer I took it the more ill I got and the further I sunk into a depression that I just couldn’t crawl out of.

So I spent three months recovering in an inpatient psychiatric hospital. I was very lucky that it was a caring and incredible place.  They were three of the hardest months of my life, however with a balance of good therapy, medication and hard work, I am very much on the road to recovery now.

That is kind of why I have re – started my blog actually. It was the suggestion of my therapist that I use my blog again. But there are going to be a few changes.

First, I have made the difficult decision to stop chemo. So, whilst cancer will always remain part of my life, my life going forward will be more than just cancer. Something I couldn’t feel before.  

Second I have been matched with a guide dog!!! Two years of waiting (well, one and a bit, I did pause my position on the ready to train list for a time when I was so poorly) It came as a huge, but welcome shock to me and I am actually due to go on class with him in two weeks!! I am going to wait a little until I properly introduce him to you all but I can not wait.

It feels good to be writing again.